Real

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Grahm and I are a year old today. Not so "Recently Roached" anymore. We're basically experts on this whole marriage thing; go ahead ask us anything. (Ha.)

This time a year ago, I was putting on my white dress. I was getting ready with my best friends and anticipating my new life and role as Mrs. Roach. My stomach was a jumble of nerves and excitement. I wanted everything to go smoothly; I wanted all the details I had worked so hard on to turn out beautifully. But I knew if it didn't... if my bridesmaids had set each other on fire and my cake had toppled to the floor... it wouldn't have mattered. I was still marrying my best friend. 

I'm not sure what I thought marriage would be like one year ago. I wish I had written it down. Whatever preconceived notions were in my head, however, have definitely been blown out of the water. Marriage is a wonderful pie slice of joy and struggle, where chocolate filling is happiness and the crust is all your disagreements. You can't really have one without the other. Otherwise, you'd just have pudding. Or graham crackers. That's not pie; that's not a real marriage. (This analogy probably didn't work at all, but pie is on the brain. Nom.)

Grahm and I definitely have our problems, sure. I get mad too easily; he never remembers our plans. I can't cook (a good) dinner to save my life; he rivals a four-year-old in the picky-eater department. I struggle with wanting to micro-manage everything; his middle name is aloof. I fart too much; he farts too much. The list goes on. Throw into the mix that Grahm is a male engineer and I'm a female writer and the communication issues just take a nosedive from there. 

But for all our quirks and shortcomings, we have a beautiful marriage because it is real. We are true to ourselves and true to each other. We are imperfect people trying to love Christ and love each other with a selfless love. It's not always donuts and roses, but I know our love, real love, is better than any fairytale I could ever imagine.





32 comments:

Kristina from Everything Changes said...

What a wonderful post...

I like your pie analogy. I think you hit the nail on the head, actually.

Veronica Lee Burns said...

being newly married myself, I can't imagine what a year from now will look like but it sure is encouraging to hear from others about how much better it gets.
Lovely post Jenna! I love reading your work.
ps: your pictures are AWESOME!

Kristin said...

love the picture with the chalkboard!

Mandy@OrangeAutumn said...

Happy anniversary!! You two are so cute together and you have such a solid foundation.

Krista said...

happy anniversary! And the pictures are so beautiful!

Catherine Zoller said...

I totally understand the engineer/writer disparity. Jay and I have been married over 30 years now! We have learned a lot. There are several books that helped us navigate the waters. Call me if you want them. I also have some KILLER recipes that took my picky husband from a "turning my nose up" into a true believer! I can share those with you as well! Oh, and congratulations!

Lauren said...

Happy Anniversary! I love the picture of you guys walking toward each other - SO CUTE x

Michaela said...

Happy anniversary! Your pictures are beautiful!!

xxx

lo @ crazy ever after said...

Beautifully written, my dear. I miss reading your blog. Off to stalk the last several posts. ;)

lo @ crazy ever after said...

Wait. It appears as if we have both sucked at this blogging business. Too cool for (blog) school we are.

Lauren said...

Happy anniversary!! Our first year married was harder than our second :) You guys are a beautiful couple and I LOVE your pictures!!

Kristen Danielle said...

I've missed you around the blog world! These pictures are breath taking, Jena! Y'all are one gorgeous couple. Grahm sort of looks like a John Mayer/Acoustic guitar singer in that second picture... Just waiting for him to bust out "I'm yourssss la-da-dee-da" :) Oh, & that pie analogy was awesome/really mean... now I want pie, too.

:) xoxo

Jenna said...

Congratulations on one year of marriage! Here's to many, many more to come :)

xxx
Jenna

k8te said...

happy one year! sounds like you guys have a very good (and real) thing going! :)

Allison said...

These pictures are so fabulous. I love the moving one. Happy anniversary!!!

Alana Christine said...

Yay for the Roach's! I LOVE the second picture! I can't believe y'all were able to keep such serious faces!

Liz Brown said...

Way to be, Jena and Grahm!

(I love your pictures. Post them all.)

Cheyla Marie said...

Happy anniversary!! Love the picture!

Carlie said...

Happy Anniversary! You two look like models in the 2nd picture! All of them look great!

Sarah @ 90 Percent Blonde... said...

Happy anniversary!

Rachel said...

Geez, you two are SO PRECIOUS. I've missed your posts, missy! So glad to hear all is well :)

Erin said...

Great post girl! I can't believe all that we have learned in our first year of marriage, and I know there is still SO MUCH to learn. I welcome it though... marriage is such an incredible thing and the day I was getting married I had no CLUE how great and also how tough it would be :)

Super cute pics too!!

L-Kat said...

Congrats on your anniversary. You guys are such a cute couple! :)

Amy said...

Happy Anniversary! :) :)
What a beautiful, and delicious, definition of marriage.
"You can't really have one without the other. Otherwise, you'd just have pudding. Or graham crackers. That's not pie; that's not a real marriage."
:)
And i love y'alls pictures...the one of y'all fading into each other...*swoon* gorgeous!

Sar said...

OHMYGOSH! The one where y'all are looking at each other is amaaaazing! Love them all.

Also, how did you miss the hilariously awesome graham [Grahm] crackers pun with the pie?! Come on! ;)

Love this. Love it all!

Nicole - Craft My Soul said...

Happy anniversary! The pictures are stunning!!!!!

Kathy B. said...

This is such a beautiful post! You guys are the funkiest, most gorgeous couple I ever did see! You make me want to get married too!

Congrats on one year! xXx

Tamara said...

Happy Anniversary! Wishing you guys a great 2nd year!

Meg {henninglove} said...

congrats on your one year you two!! you are adorable and wishing you many many more years of love, happiness and laughter

Lauren said...

Absolutely LOVE the pictures! :)

xo

Second Hand Rose said...

Aww this is such a lovely post!! Happy belated one year anniversary! Love stories like this are so sweet and real, I wish you a lifetime of happiness and its great to see two people so in love, where are the tissues!? XxxX http://thesecondhandrose.blogspot.co.uk

callie said...

LOVE this.. great post!