eating habits of a New Year's dread(er)

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

My body is smart. Like really smart.

Every year about this time, I go into full-on hunger mode -- aka I act like a fenzied woman pregnant with octuplets having all kinds of crazy cravings. (I may or may not have eaten cream cheese straight outta its package yesterday.) It's like I have no control, like my body is having an out of body experience (that's confusing).  It does what it wants, munching on what it wills -- and let's just say, it wills A LOT.

My body does this because it knows New Year's is coming. The dreaded day I feel the need to do something about how much Dr Pepper I guzzle, how many pints of ice cream I devour, yada yada. You know, like everyone else on planet earth.

I guess my body feels the need to stock up on all the deliciousness it's about to be deprived of. After all, these thunder thighs of mine need the carbs. My body is sneaky smart.

Something needs to be done, people.
I'm eating more than Grahm is at dinner time -- which isn't entirely unusual. But over cheddar bacon chicken and asparagus (it's true, your pee WILL smell) yesterday, I had this inexplicable urge to wharf the entire meal down before he got home from work -- and claim I didn't make anything so we needed to eat out so I could have, ya know, ANOTHER meal.


Last night I couldn't sleep (There's not much scarier than a hungry insomniac) so I raided the kitchen. It's impossible to sneak around our one bedroom apt, (I mean the kitchen is literally 5 feet from our bed) but my hunger pains trumped sleeping husband's need for quiet. It didn't matter that it was 3 a.m. My tummy knows no time -- she only knows that that biscuit looks real gooood.

We don't keep snack food around (like chips or candy or anything yummy) so I won't be munching on it all the time (note the irony) -- but after a few minutes of digging around, I found some things I could eat. I had two bowls of cereal and some ice cream that I forgot we had. And leftover cheesecake icing. And some bread. Okay, lots of bread.

What little self control I have has officially been tossed out the window since it's December. (And Pinterest, your delicious Christmas ideas are not helping). So if you see me and I look like ate a small child, I probably did. But don't worry. New Year's is coming. This fat thing is only temporary, I hope?

12 comments:

Angela said...

Thanks for the comment on Ladyhub girly! I love your blog -- your pictures are beautiful.

xoxoAnge
ladyhub.blogspot.com

Kristen said...

I hear you. From Halloween (all the candy and sweets kick off the Holiday season) to just after Christmas, I find myself eating alarming amounts of food. I always use the cold weather as an excuse. I need to eat more because shivering in the cold is burning so many calories! LOL

JUST ME said...

That's me, about once a month, during...well, that time of the month.

There is one day where I literally can't stop myself from eating like 7 cookies. Usually, I have great self control, but during this one day, SHUT UP SELF CONTROL I WANT COOKIES.

It scares me.

 Curly J said...

Awesome post! I love how you write, it makes me smile and laugh silently (and sometimes out loud too) to myself. Even when no one's home. I have also eaten straight out of cream cheese container though. What's the point of dirtying a dish, when you only live with one other person? I say dip those crackers!! lol

Christina said...

I am totally getting in shape after the new year. The after wedding weight gain is real and needs to go away.

Lindsey said...

Never, ever go to France. Every 20 steps you'll be buying a pain au chocolat and justifying it with, "Well, but I walk a lot more than I do at home..." LIES.

k.elizabeth said...

Your post totally made me laugh. I am the same way this time of year. I will be starting to really watch what I eat after the new year as well! And I am sure there will be a few posts complaining about that...kinda like a coping mechanism. ;) Best of luck to you!

Aissa said...

totally agree with you on this. my husband has completely given up on me working out, and he thinks i haven't been trying since our vacation in july. eek! but come the new year, apparently he's going to "whip me back into shape so i'd better enjoy this time." i will just have to think of more excuses!

Sweeney said...

I don't keep snack food in my apartment either, largely to prevent the 3am munchie attacks. Unfortunately, I absolutely must keep cereal around and the fact that pouring myself a bowl of cereal is so easy has made that a popular snack substitute for me so I'm not sure how much I actually accomplish with my keep-out-all-the-snacks stance.

Liesl said...

I'm so happy to know that it's not just me! I've been stuffing my face with everything in our house lately. For dinner tonight I had a pancake and a bowl of cereal, and now I'm craving Doritos... or maybe a cube of cheese. Mmm...

Carly {xoxo teacherista} said...

Been here before. And what is it with eating more than guys? Boyfriend B not only eats slowly (one time I ordered dessert when he left to go to the bathroom but was still working on dinner-it was actually our first day-awkward much??) but I just can't deal with it. Not like he'll eat the dessert with me anyways. I have recently acquired more self control, and I try to eat smaller meals throughout the day and add more protein into the mix, which has helped a lot! I also used to eat my feelings and now I either workout or go shopping. Both better for my body, but the second is much harder on my bank account.

wanderingtracks said...

This is me every 3 weeks. It starts about 4 or 5 days before my period and continues until the 1st or 2nd day of my period. I. Can't. Stop. Eating. EVER!

I make runs to the grocery store just to get a bar of chocolate. My appetite never curbs. I ALWAYS feel hungry. My roommates always look at me like I'm crazy, but I just can't help it. So with that said, I feel the need here to say--DON'T YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELF. Sometimes we just get hungry, and it's the holidays which basically means a freebee so eat to your hearts content! And enjoy it! ;)