A Smell and a Crack

Monday, November 7, 2011

I've officially joined the American housewives club.

I broke down and bought the safest "candle" in the world - aka a lightbulb. Grahm and I have only lit a couple wicked candles [oh that's funny, you could read this like wicked as in evil] in our apartment, but since we have a gas heater and a gas stove I figured an open flame probably wasn't the smartest idea.

...Not that anyone would be crying if this jankosaurus place burned to the ground. I guess I would, mostly because it takes time and considerable care to rebuild your wardrobe. Grahm would basically need to buy seven more tee shirts and three pairs of jeans. Mine, however, is a collection of years beginning with my vintage seventh grade fashion, which I mostly keep around as a self-esteem booster to make sure my hips can still slip into those jeans. How would I make sure that I'm still maintaining my 12-year-old boyish figure if that faded denim was burned to a crisp? My hips would explode by the sudden freedom.

Scentsy not only makes sense, it also makes scents. Ooo that was bad. But seriously, my apartment [all 400 sq. ft. of it] smells like heaven right now. More accurately, blueberry cheesecake. My honker is actually not very good at smelling, so the fact that I'm in yummy sensory overload is kind of a big deal.
This is great because it masks my intense Clorox cleaning from yesterday. It's also a bit deceptive, because Grahm and I are expecting a blueberry cheesecake to pop out of the oven at any second. But we both know me. That's not happening. Need I refer you to the infamous pot roast?

Hooray for yummy smells and no fire. You should contact my friend, Mary Rachel, if you're interested in getting some for your home. If you're friends with me, you're probably getting this for Christmas. Surprise!

So we have no fear of fire over here in Oklahoma City, but we DO have earthquakes? Go figure. The one time Oklahoma decides to get scary, my husband isn't here. Thankfully, I was with some church friends in Norman when the second quake of the day hit on Saturday evening. Kinda crazy. We were laughing in our confusion, not knowing what to do. This would be the best way to suddenly die, I think.
"Ha ha ha! What do we do? Ha ha ha! We're in an earthquake, this is fun! Ha ha ha!"

Don't worry, no one died. Nothing even fell over. It did seem to last a ridiculously long time though. We stood in the door frames, waiting for the trembling to stop. Maybe this is how Satan gets his kicks every once in a while - he grabs houses from below and shakes them back and forth until we think we're going to die.

I was a teensy bit nervous when I came home. What if Oklahoma just needed to perfect its earthquakes before we all actually died? Three times the charm, anyone?  Thankfully, no more craziness happened.



Grahm got home last night from his way-too-long-of-a-trip to Tampa. We both decided that saving 300ish bucks wasn't worth the separation. Aren't we cute? I'm glad we didn't have the opposite reaction, thankful for a break. We are, after all, approaching 72 days of marriage... the length any covenant should last, according to Kim Kardashian.

So if I get swept away by a tornado or lost in the cracks of an earthquake, at least my handsome husband will be with me!

18 comments:

L-Kat said...

Blueberry cheesecake? That does sound like heaven! :) So glad you're okay after the quakes - super scary!

Nagehan said...

The word earthquake makes me sad after the recent earthquake in Turkey. But Candles make things everything okay and cozy. Especially if you have the safest candles ever made ;)

Rena said...

I'm glad that my running is inspiring you. I love your wedding photos. They are so gorgeous.

shtoshouwhat said...

Yeah, earthquakes are not fun.. especially if you're alone. How big was that earthquake? They've been a pretty regular occurrence lately in the bay area. Like 2.8-3.5s every week or two weeks. It's crazy. I'm almost always alone and think... eeep, is this gonna be a big one!?

Matt and Chelsea said...

Yay for newlyweds. I just found your blog through other blogs and we just got married on September 2nd :) I'm excited to be following your blog!

Kim said...

I giggled all the way through the blueberry cheesecake paragraph. Dude. I now what you mean about the smelling thing! Is it a condition? Sometimes I feel like all I can smell is really gross stuff... and bacon.

Sarah said...

I'm definitely going to have to keep Scentsy in mind for when I get my own apartment. I loveeee candles, but you're right...not always the safest thing ever.

I've only ever been through one earthquake. And I reacted similarly to you. I kind of laughed and then I was like, "Oh...wait. Is this an earthquake?" Lol.

Nicole said...

You are such an incredible doll! I love your writing. And cheers on being horribly miserable while you were apart from your hubby. :) I just returned on Sunday from a two week trip to China. It was pure sadness being apart. And we've been married a whopping five months! :)

xoxo

Debby said...

Thanks for stopping by Cozy Blanket. You and your husband are the cutest couple. Love your post. I love candles but have had some scary things happen because of them........like one exploding and burning my face and eyes......that hurt.
That aftershock you had was a big one. Stay safe.

Lindsey said...

Scentsys are fun! I think you would like the camou camou flavor/scent. Soon they become flavors that are edible and not simply "smells" anymore. Oy.

Shannon :: The Scribble Pad said...

Oh my goodness, I am laughing out loud right now. Loving your blog, your sense of humor, and your abrupt honesty. Oh, and thanks for stopping by my little corner of the internet too!

Tina said...

i have never heard of those candles but with your all gas situation, i think you're right about it being safe! lol sounds interesting.

omg i heard about them earthquakes there and was like what??? that shit is nuts. at least no one got hurt!

thanks for visiting my blog! ill follow yours :) hope you'll follow mine!

unceasingexploration said...

I agree--Bryan and I have decided that we're just going to scrape together the price of another plane ticket in the future. ^^ And I love scented candles! They help preserve the illusion of heat without requiring the heat to actually be turned on...

~Liv

siddathornton said...

thank you so much for the sweet comment on my blog! i'm a huge fan of scentsy - my favorite scent in mochadoodle - delicious.

Mary Rachel said...

Aw Jena, thanks for the promotion! Glad you're enjoying your Scentsy!

Bon Bon said...

haha, funny girl:-) You are so right about apartment living! Jankosaurus! xoxo

metamorphocity.com said...

So. You had me at jankosaurus. You are hilarious, my friend. Thanks for popping by the blog!

Meagan Shack said...

I live in a jankosaurus apartment too. Glad your ok after the eathquake! and thanks for stopping by my blog. Yours is super fun!